I discovered RIE (aka Respectful Parenting) while researching the Montessori method and came to the conclusion that I wanted to use them cooperatively to raise my child. I am going to compare the two philosophies and show you why they are perfectly matched.
Both the philosophies of Montessori and RIE (Resources for Infant Educarers) are founded on respect for the child. They complement each other in their views and approaches and can be applied together with great success in terms of positive child outcomes.
How Do Montessori And RIE Compare?
What is RIE all about?
Resources for Infant Educarers (RIE), founded by Magda Gerber, is based on the Pikler method founded by Dr. Emmi Pikler.
Dr Pikler is known for changing the fate of orphaned children suffering from institutionalism. She used her method to train the nurses who were caring for the infants at the Loczy Orphanage in Budapest, Hungary. This revolutionized the child outcomes of these abandoned children from being dismal to thriving.
Magda Gerber helped train the nurses at the Loczy Orphanage under Dr. Pikler’s guidance. When she moved to the United States, she saw it fit to spread these important principles to both caregivers and parents.
The basic principles of RIE
- Respect
- Raising an authentic child
- Trust in the infant’s competence
- Sensitive observation
- Involving the child in caregiving times
- A safe, challenging, predictable environment
- Time for uninterrupted play and freedom to explore
- Consistency
What do RIE and Montessori have in common?
The mindset required to implement both Montessori and RIE is indistinguishable. There are so many similarities between the two but I will focus on the fundamental philosophies of each to show how they share the same core values.
Trust the child/Follow the child
RIE believes in not interfering with a child’s process and to follow their lead. She asks that we refrain from propping babies up who can’t yet sit and teach crawling babies to walk. We should allow children to develop naturally. This means trusting your child and valuing their individual process. It is important to learn when to take action and when not to interfere.
‘Basic trust means believing in your child’s competence and supporting her authenticity. It is believing that whatever your child needs to know she will learn. In this way, she will grow to trust in herself and in you. This will promote her feelings of security and allow her to begin to develop good judgment.’ -Magda Gerber
Maria Montessori also realized that children learn better when they get to choose their activities and much of the Montessori approach is to take your cues from the child when making any decision. Children in a Montessori classroom are allowed to progress at their own pace.
Children Are Self-Educators
The Montessori philosophy believes that provided with the right environment and support – children will essentially educate themselves through their curiosity and play. This opinion is shared whole-heartedly by Magda Gerber.
RIE asks that we refrain from entertaining babies and teaching children constantly because we are interfering with their learning. They are learning all the time even if we can’t see what it is that they are doing.
A Mutually Respectful Relationship
Both philosophies are built on a strong foundation of mutual respect.
Respect in RIE starts at birth. Respecting a baby means treating them like a whole person who has a point of view and who deserves to be consulted about activities that involve them. Respect evolves with time to include setting boundaries, accepting your child as they are, and allowing your child to discover the world in their own unique way.
The Montessori method also reminds us that we are modeling behavior to our children at all times and to act respectfully if we want respect in return.
Keen Observation Skills
Observation is an integral part of both Montessori and RIE practice. Without observation it would be impossible to follow the child.
Observation is one of the most important skills that any Montessori teacher has to learn in order to become the best guide to the children in her care. Without observation – you can’t practice the Montessori method.
By learning to be more present and less distracted – we are improving our observational skills. This observation is key if we are to follow the child. Observation is critical in getting to know your child. How do you select activities for your Montessori shelf if you do not know what skills your child is currently working on? How do you know what to communicate to your young infant when they cry if you haven’t been observing them?
Uninterrupted Work/Play
It is fundamentally disrespectful to interrupt someone when they are fully immersed in something regardless of their age. Maria Montessori felt that children who were constantly interrupted became less able to concentrate and so the three hour work cycle is a key characteristic of a Montessori classroom.
The same is understood in RIE. Children are left to play without the involvement or interruption from adults. Your role is to be present in the moment. The child is the producer, director and star of the show. You are just a supporting actor.
Independence As The End Goal
The goal in Montessori and RIE is to raise a curious and independent child who loves to learn. Building confidence is paramount in both methodologies since independence is directly linked to how much self-confidence a child has.
Magda Gerber believes that this confidence should be instilled from birth. Her message is that by trusting our children and allowing them autonomy we are saying ‘I believe you can do it.’ It is important not to do things for our children that they can do for themselves. When we take over – we rob them of the opportunity to learn.
The Right Environment
The RIE philosophy advocates for the use of a yes space. This is an area in your home where you can essentially leave your child unattended for a while and have peace of mind that they will be safe. When children are safe – parents can feel more relaxed and won’t be forced to constantly say no. Relaxed parents equal happy children who can be left to play without being interrupted.
The RIE approach also talks about the benefits of a calm environment with predictability and routine.
The prepared environment in Montessori is of vital importance in the classroom and at home. The environment is specifically prepared with the child in mind. Everything in the home and classroom is set up for the child to use independently. Montessori believes that children need a calm and organized environment. Where everything has its place.
Freedom within Limits
When it comes to discipline RIE and Montessori are in agreement that children should be allowed freedom within the safe constraints of boundaries.
In RIE we are encouraged to set clear limits and that permissiveness is in fact unkind. It is important for a child to understand what is expected of them ahead of time. The freedom comes from knowing where the boundaries are.
Montessorians are equally clear on the importance of ground rules and allowing for freedom of choice, movement, communication, repetition, time and to make mistakes.
Both approaches also talk about the importance of being consistent with regards to the limits. Children benefit immensely from predictability.
How do RIE and Montessori differ?
It is technically incorrect to compare Montessori and RIE. It’s much like comparing apples and oranges. One cannot replace the other since they were developed for different reasons. Each serves a different purpose.
Even though Montessori is so much more than just an educational pedagogy – it was still developed with the purpose to educate children. RIE was developed to serve as a resource for parents and caregivers and guide them with regard to taking care of young children.
Montessori has schools and teachers (guides) and classrooms. RIE has caregivers and parents in home environments.
Montessori has specially designed materials that are unique to Montessori. RIE doesn’t require any apparatus.
So you can see how these two philosophies each function in their own right and why it isn’t fair or helpful to actually compare them to each other. It doesn’t have to be one or the other. They share the same values and therefore they can and should be used together!
Helpful Resources For Respectful Parents
If you are interested in learning more about the RIE approach I would suggest reading My Self-Confident Baby by Magda Gerber and Allison Johnson. I read it when my son was 3 months old and I wish I found it sooner. You can also visit the official RIE site for more information..
The person who I ‘consult’ for every RIE question I have is Janet Lansbury. I will urge anyone to go and read everything on her brilliant site and listen to all of her Podcasts. She trained under Magda Gerber and really embodies what RIE stands for. You can also read her books ‘No Bad Kids’ and ‘Elevated Childcare’ both of which I recommend to just about anyone who will listen.
